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Editor’s note: Peggy Drexler, Ph.D., is a research psychologist, documentary film producer, and author, including two books on gender and family, and a book on female misbehavior, Mean, to be published by Simon & Schuster in 2024. increase. Her latest film, ‘King Coal,’ will premiere at the 2023 Sundance Film Festival. The opinions expressed in this commentary are hers.see more opinion on CNN.
CNN
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The soap opera, Prince Harry vs. the British Monarchy, continued this week, with buzz surrounding the release of his memoir Spare. has gone public, and ITV has provided some eyebrow-raising anecdotes, heightening already sharp tensions between the Duke of Sussex and wife Meghan Markle, as well as the royal family. Ridiculous details aside, the most notable disclosure involved new details regarding Harry’s relationship with his brother Prince William, whom Harry calls his “archnemesis” in the book.
Thanks to real-world events such as the death of Queen Elizabeth II, the coronation of Prince Harry’s father Charles III, and the resignation of former Prime Minister Liz Truss, public interest in the royal family has never been higher. The massive popularity of fictionalized series like “The Crown” — and Harry and Meghan are certainly taking advantage of it.
Good for them. Harry may have developed some sympathy for what he once endured a lifetime as a “spare.” Harry and Meghan have left the royal family amid complaints that they prefer their private lives as ‘regular people.’ In an excerpt from an upcoming interview, Harry told ITV: not an institution. ”
Yet here they are completely and happily creating that fodder themselves.
And it’s fodder. Among the gossipy allegations Harry threw at his brother in “Spare” were the details of a physical altercation between the two that caused William to knock Harry to the floor and scratch him. ‘s wife, Kate Middleton, was responsible for encouraging Harry’s controversial Nazi outfit in 2005. The “Spare” revelation also affects Meghan and Kate’s relationship. has repeatedly declined to comment on
Through these disclosures, what we see is a little brother desperately fighting back against a lifetime of inferiority complex, but doing so in the dirtiest way possible. .
Competition between children is common, and sibling rivalry between siblings is even more pronounced, especially when there are only two siblings. Granted, most people weren’t born into families with a set of hierarchies that help them remember their exact location. But fraternal discord has always existed, and has inspired countless works of art (most of them tragic) in all fields. Harry is nothing special — he is one of the most common dramas of human nature.
He is neither a victim nor innocent. Much has been made about Meghan’s influence on Harry’s estrangement from his family since their union began, but it’s now clear that an injured man went in search of what he needed. And he understood his anger. he found it in her. Her ambitions drove her career as an actress, and her own family life included her half-sisters’ disputed relationship with her father. A woman who wasn’t afraid to express herself, even to royalty.
It’s clear Harry and Meghan are trying to control the narrative about themselves, to some degree, after negative press coverage that brought misogyny and racism to their already toxic family dynamic. Attempting to heal those wounds by making family matters public and private is neither noble nor will it save him. You may sympathize most with William, who, unlike Harry, has few options.
William will become king, but Harry will not. But it’s unclear if that’s what William wants, or if his patriotism and family obligations make him do it instead, as he’s taking the royal road of silence. Isn’t it ironic that we know far more about Harry and Meghan, the couple who resigned from royal life because they wanted to keep it private, than the couple who chose to stay?
You can and should be disrespectful of how Harry chooses to approach his life situations, but you can also show him compassion and understanding. He did not fully create himself. And although he grew up protected and very privileged, he’s probably a pretty immature 38-year-old.
Now he’s rebelling against the machine that made him the only way he knows how. He felt exploited as a child and as a young adult. He now benefits from his family (and earns a huge amount of money in the process).
Perhaps one day we will hear that Harry is a man truly independent of the royal family, and that he, time and time again, adamantly wants separation. , there is a possibility that becoming a victim is expected. But when it does, Harry is no longer alone.
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