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The other day I was in Durant, Oklahoma. This might be the worst line in a country song ever written, but it wasn’t.
Let’s clear this up quickly. Pronounced Doo-rant. A little further west, the town is spelled Cyril and pronounced “Suh-Reel”. Nor does the town in northeastern Oklahoma, which shares its name with Florida’s largest city, share its pronunciation. Oklahoma has My-am-uh.
I know, I know, it’s an Oklahoma thing. Then again, New World explorers drove people in search of El Doo La Doe, not El Doo Lay Doe, as in southern Arkansas towns. So really, the Arkansas have nothing to say.
Anyway, I was in Durant for the Bomb Cyclone. Sorry, sounds like a bad amusement park ride or one of the drinks sold at Spring Break locations that is basically fruit juice, sugar and Everclear. we were all there.
Clearly, however, in this case a bomb cyclone is a meteorological phenomenon that occurs when the pressure in the low-pressure mass drops by at least 24 mbar in 24 hours. I don’t know what that means, so I have to say it’s a bad thing based on what’s going on around me.
Also, was “bomb cyclone” always one of those baseball terms used by weather forecasters, or did they just make it up and sit around the convention (which I assume is happening) and ask how I did it? I wonder if you’re laughing at how we got them all. Civilians used the name of the drink everyone was drinking, like real weather.
Again, I digress. And it doesn’t explain why he was with Durant. I was on my way to Lawton and it didn’t work out. Yeah, I know, it doesn’t really lift the veil much, does it?
Now let’s work backwards. Me, the lovely Mrs. Smith, and my youngest daughter’s girlfriend were on our way to Lawton to pick up the aforementioned youngest son, who had returned to the US from an overseas mission in South Korea. And since he’s in the U.S. military and has to act by virtually all rules, his itinerary travels from South Korea to Seattle, Dallas, and Lawton, Oklahoma, where he’ll be stationed.
I was going to drive through Oklahoma City to Lawton, but the road in front of me was basically an ice skating rink and the highway patrolmen at the convenience store drove me backtracking further south on the front line. Told us it needed to be working. My wife literally talks about anything to anyone anywhere so he knew to tell us this is not a bad thing anymore he is one case.
However, I found out that I couldn’t get to Lawton via Oklahoma City, so my son realized that he couldn’t get to Lawton from Dallas. Thanks to the Bomb Cyclone, Lawton has become America’s most exclusive place, second only to warmer places.
So while we started drifting through southern Oklahoma like empty plastic bags in a parking lot, waiting to know exactly where we were going to land at night, our youngest daughter turned into a version of a real-life techie in every spy movie, manipulating her laptop to try and get another ticket to somewhere closer to Seattle.
The story ends with a spy movie ending, but instead of one of us having to cut wires to keep the bomb from going off, my youngest daughter got him another ticket for a later flight. I was able to put it in He made it to Dallas and we stopped wandering and made it to the airport. We all went home for Christmas. So miracles happen.
I’m not sure what the moral of this story is, but if you ever get the chance to talk to a highway patrolman at a convenience store, take it. Or, it’s always nice to have a daughter who can navigate different airline ticket sites.
Or this is probably the most correct. If you find yourself in Durant, Oklahoma, even if you can pronounce it correctly, you’ll want to go somewhere else.
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